I never really understood that song title, because I'm only miserable when I'm by myself... Anyway, it's Friday night and I need to rant, and everyone is busy, so here you go.
All week I'd been planning to hang out with a friend - we'll call him S - and this morning he bailed. This wouldn't normally bother me but this friend really ticked me off a few months ago by bailing on me over and over, and we hit a very rough patch because of it. I knew it was going to happen again today, but there was still a cupful of excitement of getting to hang out and watch a movie, considering I've been pretty much alone and bored all week (no money).
I had another friend - Tiny (remember him?) - who was meant to see me on Wednesday but couldn't, which really didn't bother me then. So my second choice was to see if he was available. And, of course, he wasn't. That's no one's fault. I just wanted to complain a bit about the injustice of timing. He did offer to see me for a short while between work and a music session, but me being the ever-polite happy thing that I am, told him he didn't have to. So he didn't. Which is fine.
My last option was... someone else... and he had a leaving party for one of his workmates that he gave up his Nerd Night to go to. When he heard I was free, he said he'd be done by 9 o'clock, and he could come see me. I told him that he didn't have to if it would be inconvenient. Later, he tells me he's staying on at the party, and that he wasn't planning to. So, I asked him why he was staying if he wasn't planning to and he said "I have nothing else to do." Really? Thanks. I then told him that he could have come over here if he wanted and he said "It's OK, I'll see you tomorrow."
[Insert clenched-teeth smile here.]
The thing is, it got me wondering about what people DON'T give up to see me when I need them. That last person, for example, has only ever given up his Nerd Night (every Friday night) twice in the time that I've known him. One to see his sister, and one for this party of free food and drink. Do I really need to start offering my friends dinner and booze just to get them to come see me? Or will they push me further and further (without realising it, in fairness) until I crack and tell them all to go to hell, eat a bucket of ice cream and watch Supernatural, wondering why all men can't be like the Winchester boys...
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